Questions
Start with a question: from a concrete situation, from a feeling, or about choosing between skills. Each question leads to fitting DBT entry points.
43 Questions
Questions from concrete situations
These entry points begin with everyday, crisis, or relationship situations and move from there into fitting skills, concepts, or next steps.
Which skill helps me first when everything is escalating?
I am extremely tense. Where should I start?
I do not know what is going on with me right now. Where do I get orientation?
Should I accept this or try to change it?
How do I say clearly what I need?
How do I set a boundary without losing myself?
How do I reconnect after tension in a relationship?
How do I prepare for a stressful situation?
I cannot settle down. Where do I start?
I am stuck in a conflict. What is a good first step?
I am losing myself right now. What strengthens my self-respect?
I cannot sleep. What can I do tonight?
An urge to use is coming up. Which skills could support me?
I feel misunderstood. What could help?
How did things escalate, and what can I learn from it?
Should I end a relationship, and how could I approach it?
How can I get through a difficult moment and soothe myself?
What could support me with nightmares and difficult nights?
How can I listen attentively and understand the other person better?
Questions from named emotions
These entry points begin with a clearly named emotion and lead onward toward regulation, acceptance, or the next useful action step.
Anxiety is overwhelming me right now. What helps immediately?
I am angry and do not know what to do with it. What first?
I feel a lot of shame. How do I get out of this?
I am sad and exhausted. What could help me?
How can I handle strong disgust?
How can I handle feelings of guilt?
How can I notice and enjoy joy?
I feel jealous. How can I respond?
How can I handle envy and comparisons?
Something surprised me. How can I find my bearings?
How can I explore my curiosity mindfully?
How can I experience love and connection mindfully?
Questions for choosing and telling skills apart
Start here if you have a question but do not yet know the right skill. Each guiding question leads to concrete entry points.
What Helps Now Versus Long Term?
If you have to differentiate between immediate aid and longer-term development.
Which Skill Helps Me First?
If you don't want to search first, but rather find the right first skill room.
Is This Self-Soothing or Improving the Moment?
When it's unclear whether you need to calm down or make the whole moment more bearable.
What Needs Acceptance Instead of Fight?
When fighting against facts creates more suffering and reality work becomes necessary.
What Is the Difference Between These Skills?
When several skills sound similar but do not have the same task.
What Belongs to This Bundle?
If you first want to understand how a bundle is structured and which parts belong together.
Is This Validation or Radical Acceptance?
When it is unclear whether an experience needs to be validated or a fact needs to be accepted.
Is This Turning the Mind or Willingness?
If it is unclear whether you still have to turn back to acceptance or go on standby.
How Intensely Should I Ask or Say No?
When you need to clarify not only what you want to say, but also how clearly you should say it.
Is This Assertiveness Scripts or DEAR MAN?
If it is unclear whether you need a complete bundle or a specific discussion template.
Is This Validation or Mutual Validation?
When it is unclear whether a perspective needs to be validated first or whether it needs to be made negotiable on both sides.
How Do I Change an Unwanted Emotion?
When there is a feeling and you need to clarify the next effective change step.